We are landlords

So hell kinda froze over guys and gals. Remember that house in Danville we own? The one we’ve been paying a mortgage, homeowners insurance and utilities on for the past 3 years? It’s official. We have a renter in it. He’s been living there for almost a month and so far so good.I didn’t want to mention it earlier because I didn’t want to jinx it. In fact, I didn’t change my underwear at all when we were talking to the potential renter until he moved in so to guarantee not jinxing it. I just changed my underwear today. As for J, he doesn’t wear underwear so he just kept his fingers and toes crossed.

I can’t tell you how close we’ve been to getting renters in there for at least the last year and a half. It was just like Groundhog Day, the movie. It was just like Groundhog Day, the movie. Oh, did I say that already? We stopped getting our hopes up high with prospects because the same thing happened every time. I’ll give you a hint. They decided not to rent our place.

But the stars must have been aligned because this one worked out. It was a guy already living in the Danville area. He seemed interested and set up the appointment with our property manager way back in May. When I followed up with him, he said he liked it. This was the first clue that this was going to be a different situation. He didn’t say, “I like it, but it’s in the ghetto” (all potential renters get that warning in advance, yet they are still surprised when they see the neighborhood in person). He didn’t say, “I like it, but it’s way too big” (again, all potential renters get that warning). He simply said he liked it.

He even went on to say that although he couldn’t move in for awhile, he sort of wanted to enter an informal agreement that we’d hold the place. I was like sure buddy, we’ll informally hold it. Not like the phone is ringing off the hook with people wanting to sign a lease.

But then—yes, there is a but then—the universe started playing tricks on us. A previously scheduled couple went and looked at it THE VERY NEXT DAY and called me IMMEDIATELY to say they want it and want to move in 10 days ago and can we send a one-year lease because they are ready to sign. I might have spewed my iced tea a little during that phone call. I obviously had to tell the couple, um, we have someone else in line before you. In what world are there real, viable people, beside crack addicts, lined up at our front door? Only one day in three years in our world, apparently.

After a LOT of hemming and hawing (mind you this was all going on when we were road tripping to NJ for the Hindu wedding and had a million things planned and no computer access), we went with potential renter #2. Both potential tenants were awesome from what we knew and seemed like a good fit. It was purely a business decision, with a little of the sympathy card played. Renter #2 was pregnant and was willing to move in 10 days ago. You see what I mean?

But then—yes, there is ANOTHER but then—renter #2 backed out as we scrambled to get him the lease as quickly as possible. Apparently he didn’t like the neighborhood. Hi, did I not tell you to go back there day and night and make sure it was suitable for you??? You guys, I know I jest and it’s a little ghetto, but it’s not THAT ghetto. I used to live next to a meth lab and prostitution ring in Phoenix, so the empty houses and occasional crack addicts walking down our street DO NOT frighten me.

Luckily—and this is where the stars re-aligned again—renter #1 was still interested. It ended up he moved in earlier than he originally expected too. So it was only after a stress sandwich, with a side of disappointment and relief, that it all worked out.